Memorial

In honor of Memorial Day coming up we brought flowers to my grandpa's final resting place today. It the first time I've brought Toby there. Here are some photos.

Daddy

We took the kids to the zoo a few weekends ago.  While we were there we saw a group of dads with their kids taking pictures.  No moms around.  I thought to myself, "how sweet of them to spend time with their kids without the moms around".  As I more about this I began to realize what a great daddy my kids have in their lives.  My husband doesn't need a "Daddy's Playgroup" in order to take our kids out for a fun day.  When we were first alone with Breena in the hospital she pooped.  He didn't hesitate for a second to change her first diaper and listened intently as the nurse explained how to properly wipe a girl's bottom (I was bedridden- half unconcious at the time).  If it's bath night he runs the bath water before I get there.  He is ready and waiting with lotion & pj's when the kids get out of the tub.  He has sat up in the middle of the night holding a bucket while a sick child sleeps in his lap.  He is an expert spider killer.  After working a twelve hour day at work he always comes home in a good mood ready to give me much needed relief of juggling three children all day.  He never gets a chance to sit down right after work.  He is paitent when I am not.  He can keep Eli entertained for long periods of time playing invisible dinosaur.  He always backs me up on parenting decisions in front of the kids even if he doesn't agree.  When Breena wakes in the middle of the night she wants to cuddle with Daddy, not me.  He compliments me on being a mother and encourages me when one of the kids is going through a difficult stage.  We co-parent.  He is one half of the team that makes this family so great. I am grateful for him.  And I am so honored to be his children's mother. 

Fun Day

You know it's been a fun day when:
~Breena has helmet hair from wearing her bike helmet all day
~Eli's legs are covered in chalk because he discovered how fun it is to chalk on skin
~Even Toby has a diaper full of sand
~Bathtime at the end of the day only lasts five minutes because mommy is disgusted that the bath water is dark brown from these dirty little kiddos!
We sure LOVE warm spring days at our house!

Happy Mother's Day!

To the three little people who call me mommy: thank you for making me smile everyday. You've given my life more meaning than I ever thought was possible! I love each of you right up to the moon & back.

Picture

The 3 little kiddos and their big glad mommy!

May 3

It's May 3rd again.  The years seem to fly by these days.  It seems like only yesterday I spent this day painting Breena's nursery & setting up a crib in preperation for her arrival. And here I am a few short years later with with a preschooler, toddler, & infant.  My life couldn't be more different than it was on May 3, 2008.  It reminds me of the song "Before the Morning" by Josh Wilson.  I heard this song when it was released two years ago.  The lyrics couldn't be more fitting for my experience with May 3rd...

Do you wonder why you have to,
feel the things that hurt you,
if there's a God who loves you,
where is He now?

Maybe, there are things you can't see
and all those things are happening
to bring a better ending
some day, some how, you'll see, you'll see

Would you dare, would you dare, to believe,
that you still have a reason to sing,
'cause the pain you've been feeling,
can't compare to the joy that's coming

so hold on, you got to wait for the light
press on, just fight the good fight
because the pain you've been feeling,
it's just the dark before the morning

I'm extra grateful today for the morning light in my life and humbly thanking God for the beautifully tearful path that lead me to my three precious babies.  The emerald ring I wear on my hand reminds me of the promise that someday I'll hold my May 3rd baby. 

Changes

We took the kids to the zoo last Sunday.  They love animals so much and always enjoy the opportunity to see animals.  The trip served another purpose too as I was desperately needing to do something special with our kids.  This house (for lack of a better word) crap has really thrown me into a funk.  We have it listed for six months, we sign purchase agreement on our house, fall in love with a new house, deal on our house falls through and we have to rethink & start from scratch. I was not prepared for the emotional roller coaster this has ended up to be.  I'm ready for the end.  Whatever it may be.  Whether we sell & move this summer or wait it out & try again next spring.  We are under contract with the owners of the home we hope to purchase until July so for better or worse the end is in sight. 

I have spent the last week & a half doing what I do best when I find myself  in a funk: rearrange the house, purchase unnecessary things & enjoy a glass or two of wine after my kiddos are in bed.  Dave recognizes my extreme need for change every once in a while.  He's supportive.  I was trying to get him to allow Breena to adopt a kitten.  He wouldn't cave.  So instead I convinced him to switch around bedrooms.  Sunday night we did just that!  Bree & Eli now share our old room, which use to be Eli's room which was a playroom before that.  Confused yet?  We moved into Bree's room and gave Toby Eli's room.  Up until this point Toby has slept in our room (or if I'm going to be honest- Toby slept in my arms).  Toby still wakes often at night but has transitioned well into a crib by himself.  I am sleeping better because I don't hear every little snort he makes while he sleeps.  Breena & Eli are enjoying sharing a room.  In fact they should be napping as I write this but I'm hearing a lot of giggles instead. 

I keep reminding myself to be grateful that we have a safe home and are fortunate enough to be in a position to purchase a larger home.  It'll be okay if we live here another year or two.  Just cozy!